Athena (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
everlastingsoul) wrote2006-04-12 12:02 am
everlastingsoul) wrote2006-04-12 12:02 am
Useless tidbits for your everyday life
I was digging through my e-mail archives and I found these. If you've got a few minutes to kill, they'll be a fun read.
Some useless tidbits of information to brighten up your otherwise boring life.
The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; "7" was selected because the original containers were 7 ounces. "UP" indicated the direction of the bubbles.
Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.
The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.
American car horns beep in the key of F.
No piece of paper can be folded more than 7 times. (Go ahead; try it)
Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.
1 in every 4 Americans has appeared on television.
You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.
The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.
The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.
A Boeing 747's wingspan is longer than the Wright Brother's first flight.
American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class.
Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA."
Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
The 57 on the Heinz ketchup bottle represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once had.
The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.
The first owner of the Marlboro company died of lung cancer.
Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.
Betsy Ross is the only real person to ever have been the head on a Pez dispenser.
Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.
Adolf Hitler's mother seriously considered having an abortion but was talked out of it by her doctor.
Marilyn Monroe had six toes.
All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.
Walt Disney was afraid of mice.
The sound of E.T. walking was made by someone squishing her hands in jelly. Debra Winger was the voice of E.T.
Pearls melt in vinegar.
It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year's supply of footballs. (I wonder why they still call it pigskin?)
Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.
It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.
Average life span of a major league baseball: seven pitches.
A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why.
The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.
Richard Milhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal." The second? William Jefferson Clinton.
You girls will probably find this most amusing. For you guys, this is either
a refresher course or a desperately needed clue. (You know who you are!)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FINE:
This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES:
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
NOTHING:
This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with a huffy "Fine."
GO AHEAD (with raised eyebrows):
This is a dare, one that will result in my getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine."
GO AHEAD (normal eyebrows):
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
(LOUD SIGH):
This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing."
(SOFT SIGH):
Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
OH!:
This exclamation, followed by any statement, is trouble. Example: "Oh, let me get that." Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised
eyebrows and "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring ourselves to write about them.
THAT'S OK:
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's OK" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done. "That's OK" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead." At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO:
This is not a statement; it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth,
so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's OK."
THANKS:
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say, "You're welcome."
THANKS A LOT:
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A LOT," when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be
careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only say "Nothing."
The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
Her artistic sense was exquisitely refined, like someone who can tell butter from I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before.
The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Tex.) in her first several points of
parliamentary procedure made to Rep. Henry Hyde (R-Ill.) in the House Judiciary Committee hearings on the impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton.
The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fan set on medium.
Her lips were red and full, like tubes of blood drawn by an inattentive phlebotomist.
He felt like he was being hunted down like a dog, in a place that hunts dogs, I suppose.
The lamp just sat there, like an inanimate object.
You know how in "Rocky" he prepares for the fight by punching sides of raw beef? Well, yesterday it was as cold as that meat locker he was in.
He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any PH cleanser.
She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature beef.
Her pants fit her like a glove, well, maybe more like a mitten, actually.
She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a first-generation thermal paper fax machine that needed a band tightened.
A branch fell from the tree like a trunk falling off an elephant.
The painting was very Escher-like, as if Escher had painted an exact copy of an Escher painting.
Fishing is like waiting for something that does not happen very often.
They were as good friends as the people on "Friends."
He was as bald as one of the Three Stooges, either Curly or Larry, you know, the one who goes woo woo woo.
The sardines were packed as tight as the coach section of a 747.
Her eyes were shining like two marbles that someone dropped in mucus and then held up to catch the light.
The sunset displayed rich, spectacular hues like a .jpeg file at 10 percent cyan, 10 percent magenta, 60 percent yellow and 10 percent black.
Some useless tidbits of information to brighten up your otherwise boring life.
The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; "7" was selected because the original containers were 7 ounces. "UP" indicated the direction of the bubbles.
Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.
The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.
American car horns beep in the key of F.
No piece of paper can be folded more than 7 times. (Go ahead; try it)
Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.
1 in every 4 Americans has appeared on television.
You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.
The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.
The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.
A Boeing 747's wingspan is longer than the Wright Brother's first flight.
American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class.
Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA."
Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
The 57 on the Heinz ketchup bottle represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once had.
The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.
The first owner of the Marlboro company died of lung cancer.
Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.
Betsy Ross is the only real person to ever have been the head on a Pez dispenser.
Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.
Adolf Hitler's mother seriously considered having an abortion but was talked out of it by her doctor.
Marilyn Monroe had six toes.
All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.
Walt Disney was afraid of mice.
The sound of E.T. walking was made by someone squishing her hands in jelly. Debra Winger was the voice of E.T.
Pearls melt in vinegar.
It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year's supply of footballs. (I wonder why they still call it pigskin?)
Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.
It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.
Average life span of a major league baseball: seven pitches.
A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why.
The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.
Richard Milhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal." The second? William Jefferson Clinton.
You girls will probably find this most amusing. For you guys, this is either
a refresher course or a desperately needed clue. (You know who you are!)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FINE:
This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES:
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
NOTHING:
This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with a huffy "Fine."
GO AHEAD (with raised eyebrows):
This is a dare, one that will result in my getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine."
GO AHEAD (normal eyebrows):
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
(LOUD SIGH):
This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing."
(SOFT SIGH):
Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
OH!:
This exclamation, followed by any statement, is trouble. Example: "Oh, let me get that." Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised
eyebrows and "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring ourselves to write about them.
THAT'S OK:
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's OK" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done. "That's OK" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead." At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO:
This is not a statement; it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth,
so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's OK."
THANKS:
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say, "You're welcome."
THANKS A LOT:
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A LOT," when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be
careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only say "Nothing."
The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
Her artistic sense was exquisitely refined, like someone who can tell butter from I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before.
The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Tex.) in her first several points of
parliamentary procedure made to Rep. Henry Hyde (R-Ill.) in the House Judiciary Committee hearings on the impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton.
The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fan set on medium.
Her lips were red and full, like tubes of blood drawn by an inattentive phlebotomist.
He felt like he was being hunted down like a dog, in a place that hunts dogs, I suppose.
The lamp just sat there, like an inanimate object.
You know how in "Rocky" he prepares for the fight by punching sides of raw beef? Well, yesterday it was as cold as that meat locker he was in.
He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any PH cleanser.
She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature beef.
Her pants fit her like a glove, well, maybe more like a mitten, actually.
She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a first-generation thermal paper fax machine that needed a band tightened.
A branch fell from the tree like a trunk falling off an elephant.
The painting was very Escher-like, as if Escher had painted an exact copy of an Escher painting.
Fishing is like waiting for something that does not happen very often.
They were as good friends as the people on "Friends."
He was as bald as one of the Three Stooges, either Curly or Larry, you know, the one who goes woo woo woo.
The sardines were packed as tight as the coach section of a 747.
Her eyes were shining like two marbles that someone dropped in mucus and then held up to catch the light.
The sunset displayed rich, spectacular hues like a .jpeg file at 10 percent cyan, 10 percent magenta, 60 percent yellow and 10 percent black.
no subject
no subject